There have been times in my life where I did not feel alive...times where no matter how many people surrounded me, I felt alone...and times where no matter how warm it was, I felt cold inside. Those times come and go for all of us I think, but it was especially that way for me when I was overweight and depressed. I feel like the old me died seven years ago when I started my journey and a new me was created. It wasn't just bringing a body back to life like Dr. Waldman suggested. It was more like Dr. Frankenstein. I had to rebuild a new me from many different parts...some that were mine only refurbished...and some from other people along the way.I think some people think that I am crazy at times. A lot do not understand. They stand back and wonder why I do the things I do...why I don't "act my age". What they don't realize is that even though I'm 41 years old, I've only been really living for a short time. Becoming strong has given me a sureness that I never had before. Changing my body has created a confidence that did not exist. Facing my fears has taught me courage and given me the ability to make lasting changes.
Even if you are not overweight...even if you have a great life...are you really living it to the fullest? Do you feel alive? Do you rely on other people to validate you? Do the clouds take away your happiness and warmth?
I realize now that I don't need the sun to feel alive. Everything I need is in me...all the time...every day. I'm going to go to the gym and I'm going to push myself to the limit. I'm going to struggle and sweat. In the end, I will most likely end up lying on the floor, out of breath, looking lifeless...but I will be anything but lifeless. My hand will start to move and then I'll be up off the floor...glad that I did what it takes to keep me feeling alive. If you don't feel alive...if you're not really living...don't waste another moment! Make the changes you need to and start living...today.